We all know that we should be exercising, eating right and reducing our stress on a daily basis. But the majority of us don’t. Why is it so hard to do the things that we know will benefit us in the long run. What is blocking us? Everyone has different barriers to self care, but here are 5 I think are fairly universal.
1. Hustle Mentality
Social media is screaming at us “hustle, hustle, hustle” or you’re never going to make it. So, you push yourself to work longer and longer hours. You end up skipping your lunch breaks or grabbing something quick to eat. And in the end, you burn out. You make up excuses, blame others and express negative self talk. But rarely take accountability for your lack of self care.
The hustle mentality has a sneaky way of clouding your ability to notice what your body is trying to tell you something. Your body can be screaming for you to slow down. But you push yourself more and more. Till its too late. You end up sick. And forced to slow down.
Did you ever stop to think why you’re hustling so hard?
I am not denying that husting is the only way you’re going to get what you want. But it has to be for the right reasons. You want to be a basketball star, then you’re going to have to work your ass off. You want to sell your online course, you’re going to have to spend hours developing and marketing it.
But if you are killing yourself in a job you hate to make someone else happy or to buy some fancy thing that you think others will admire you for. Then it’s time to reevaluate your WHY.
2. You’re unable to say “No”
For some of us, it’s hard to say no. Especially to family and friends. We don’t want to hurt their feelings. So we keep on adding things to our to-do list. We go to events that we really don’t want to go to. And we make ourselves miserable. All because we couldn’t say no to them and yes to ourselves.
We lack boundaries when we can’t say no. And without boundaries, people will walk all over us. We start to feel out of control and stressed.
3. You care what others will think of you.
We’re all guilty of caring what people think of us from time to time. But for some, this can be paralyzing. They tell themselves “I can’t go to the gym because I am out of shape.” Isn’t that the point of the gym? Caring about what others think of us, stops us from doing self care activities that could really benefit us.
4. You’re waiting for someone else to motivate you
I hate to tell you this but the only one you need to motivate you is you. And you are free. People pay hundreds of dollars for life coaches to tell them to take care of themselves. We go on wellness retreats to hear speakers tell us to practice self care. But all you need is yourself.
If I had a walking partner, I would go walking
If I had a personal trainer, I would work out
If I could afford a nutritionist, I would eat better
But really you just need yourself to make the choice to do these activities.
5. You’re your biggest barrier to self care
Self care is a choice. A choice that you have to make to yourself every day. For the most part, you have control over your choices. And your choices have consequences
You have control over what you eat. No one is forcing you to eat that donut.
You have control over how much sleep you get. Unless you’re a mother with a newborn!
You have control over how you want to spend your time. Including how you want to spend your spare time. Re-read the section on saying no.
You have control over how you treat your body. You have to learn to be your own cheerleader.
And you have control over your thoughts. The bad, the good and the ugly thoughts.
Self-care isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always fun. And it isn’t always relaxing.
Still, struggling with barriers to self care?
CHECK OUT: Everyday Self Care – Beyond Manicures and Affirmations
CHECK OUT: Self Care Tips